Pinewood Derby & Science Fair Dad Hats

Scouting America's own blog asked it outright: a parent helped build that Pinewood Derby car? Yes, that's the whole point. Some packs cope by running a Dads division so the dads can build their own car. One hands out an award for the Car Most Likely Made by a Parent, and no one wants that one, except the man who wears PINEWOOD DERBY / CAR MOST LIKELY / MADE BY A PARENT. The derby goes back to 1953, when Don Murphy started it in Manhattan Beach, California, and more than 100 million cars have been built since. The cap is 5.0 ounces on official scales, so PINEWOOD DERBY / 5.0 OUNCES / NOT A GRAM UNDER is the weigh-in anthem for a dad who hits the limit exactly. GRAPHITE IS A PERFORMANCE ENHANCER and PINEWOOD DERBY PIT CREW are for builders who know graphite on the axles is the standard friction trick. I BUILT IT / MY KID / NAMED IT is the honest credit line. The science fair gets the same treatment, for the parent who appoints themselves Science Fair Parent and buys a Costco-size bag of lemons: I DID MY KID'S SCIENCE FAIR PROJECT AND GOT A B is the confession, and MY KID'S VOLCANO IS MY MAGNUM OPUS is pride. Three plain badges, PINEWOOD DERBY DAD, SCIENCE FAIR DAD and CUB SCOUT DAD, carry the search terms. No logos or emblems, just words, custom embroidered on an unstructured dad hat.