Meets Expectations Hats

Once a year the work stops being work and becomes evidence. You are asked to write down what you did, which turns out to be surprisingly hard, and then to rate yourself, which turns out to be a trap in both directions — too high and you lack self-awareness, too low and they agree with you. The vocabulary is the comedy. Nobody outside an office would invent a phrase like 'meets expectations' to describe a year of someone's life, and yet there it sits, a grade that is technically fine and emotionally devastating. 'Exceeds expectations' is the one everybody wants and almost nobody gets, because the distribution was decided before the conversation started. These hats belong to the person being reviewed and are pointed at the process, never at a manager. A hat that insults your boss is a hat you cannot wear to the office, which is the only place it would be funny. The target here is a form.