EBITDAWG: EBITDA Finance Meme Hats

EBITDAWG is what happens when a man who has read a quality-of-earnings report decides he also has that dawg in him. It is EBITDA — Earnings Before Interest, Taxes, Depreciation and Amortization, the metric every company reaches for when the actual profit number is disappointing — welded onto the most confident phrase on the internet. Nobody knows exactly who said it first. Everybody in finance recognised it immediately. This collection starts with the word itself, set three ways, because the joke changes with the setting: blunt sans on black reads as swagger, the same eight letters in serif on a stone hat read like a bank's letterhead having a breakdown, and on pink it reads as a man who is entirely at peace with himself. Around it are the lines EBITDAWG implies. Community adjusted EBITDA, the metric WeWork genuinely invented in 2018 and never lived down. EBITDA is not cash flow, the correction every finance person is waiting for a chance to make. My EBITDA is heavily adjusted, which is a confession. Earnings before I tricked the dumb auditor, which is the quiet part. Finally EBITDA positive, which is a milestone, a relief and a slightly desperate press release all at once. Custom embroidered dad hats for analysts, founders, controllers, deal guys and anyone who has ever had to explain an add-back with a straight face.