Don't Tell My Wife Hats

Hiding purchases from a partner is not rare. A 2022 Motley Fool survey of 1,501 people found 49 percent of those in a marriage or long-term relationship hide purchases from their partner, 56 percent of men against 43 percent of women, and 16 percent hold a hidden credit card. Forum threads of secret spenders are a catalogue of tactics: round the price down, ship to work, leave the new guitar in plain sight until nobody notices, or answer a question about it with a straight face and the words I've had this for years. These hats wear the confession. DON'T TELL MY WIFE and DON'T TELL MY HUSBAND are the badges, one for each side of the joke, the second echoing the viral TikTok trend of hiding packages from a husband. The sentence designs borrow from the forums. I PLEAD THE FIFTH ON ALL PURCHASES takes its cue from a poster who declined to answer on grounds of self-incrimination, and I'VE NEVER SEEN THAT BOAT BEFORE IN MY LIFE is the bright red motorbike story told with a bigger vehicle. I PAID CASH SO IT DOESN'T COUNT, I GET THE MAIL FIRST FOR FINANCIAL REASONS and THIS HAT WAS $10 IF ANYONE ASKS cover the tactics. The Fifth and the boat each come in a second colorway. Every design is custom embroidered on an unstructured dad hat. Wear it, or hand it to the spender in your life.