Storage Unit Auction & Auction Junkie Hats

Storage unit auctions run on a strange rule: bidders may look in from the doorway with a flashlight, but nobody gets to step inside. The highest bidder then owns everything in the unit, whether they want it or not. In a 2012 NBC Miami report a bidder summed it up as a box of chocolates, you just never know what you're going to get, and the crowds had grown from eight or ten regulars to forty or fifty. In Richmond in 2011, a $60 locker held $600 of jewelry, which is the kind of story that keeps every bidder certain that the Rolex is in the next one. These Auction Junkie hats are for that whole crowd. There are two head-term badges, AUCTION JUNKIE and STORAGE UNIT BIDDER, then the bits: bidding with your eyebrows, a $40 lamp that cost $400, a max bid of simply yes, and the unshakeable belief that there is a Rolex in one of these units. YUUUP is the Storage Wars catchphrase, already sold on tees, and LAST-SECOND EBAY SNIPER is for anyone who has watched a bidder war end with three seconds left on the clock. Every design is custom embroidered on an unstructured dad hat. Wear one to the next lien sale, or give one to the friend who always has a bid card in their pocket.